Mushy.ness

All my life, all I have ever wanted was someone who would love me for who I am, someone who would just stick around, and someone who I'd love more than I love myself..

Then you came along, and I never wanted for more.

Run with me through rows of speeding cars

* Talked to Him. And it felt great. Haven't done that in ages. I've been putting Him off for the past months. Actually, for the past 2 years. I don't know why, I just kept on ignoring Him and took Him for granted. But I know that we're okay now. I explained, said sorry, told Him stories and shared a lot of stuff about what's going on in my life. That no matter how crappy and depressing everything is I know that He would be just be with me. He just listened to every word that I was saying and I felt at ease whilst talking to Him. It was amazing. Really really amazing. Can't wait for our next session! :)

* I used to care for you. I used to be happy and relieved that you're just there. And I used to love you. But now everything has just changed. I don't know why exactly. It's like you're a different person now. It's like I got really disappointed when I got to know the real you. And I just learned how to hate you. That the more I get to be with you, the more I can't stand you. Hay, it hurts not to love you anymore. I dunno.

* I hope you two could still work it out. I really really hope so. :(

* A lot of people told me na "hanga" daw sila with our relationship. That despite the distance we still manage to work it out. It's, I think, because we believe, we never stop hoping and loving. That no matter how much we fight and all, we just know that this won't ever end anymore. Cos we believe in US. I know that you know that we really are different. As in, magkaiba talaga. But we get to love each other more despite our differences. I don't know really if everything's okay with us right now. Basta, I'm gonna talk to you na talaga.

* It sucks cos I haven't watched MSKM for two months now. Arrrgh. And American Idol pisses me off na, why is it that those great singers are the ones sent home? :(

* GUSTO KO NG UMUWI! Rawr. Hahahaha :D

EWAN.

Hahahaha. EWAN KO NA TALAGA. Anyway, yesterday was real crappy. Basta, YUN NA YUN. I don't want to go further into details. Let's just say na I STILL CAN'T LET IT GO. Hahahaha. EWAN. But dinner was fuuuuun! As in tawa to the max talaga. Tito Noe kasi was real funny. Basta. Comedy eh. Sobra.

I'm currently taking an online practice test for Bristish Citizenship. Yea, that's right in few hours time if I am able to pass the exam eh di Citizen na ako dito. Haha. EWAN. I don't even care if I'd pass the test or not. Basta, it doesn't matter to me lang. Pero yeah, it has some advantages din pero EWAN padin. Hahahaha. Sorry, laboooo. I'm so pressured na with skuul. I haven't edited the paper pa for 23 and started the paper for 22 naman. Arrrgh. Hahaha. Oh well.

My layout's image is from Devianart pala and it features Death from Sandman series by Neil Gaiman. :) Ciao!

P.S. The hottie librarian made my day! ;)

WASTED.

hahahahahahaha :D

...

Still can't get over "it".

It's eating my heart and brains out.. :(

!@!*!

GALIT AKO. GALIT NA GALIT AKO SA GINAWA MO. CAN'T BELIEVE YOU! HINDI MO MAN LANG INISIP KUNG ANONG MAFFEEL KO. EWAN KO. BAHALA KA. IT HURTS. YOU JUST DON'T KNOW HOW MUCH. I KEEP ON PICTURING THE "THING" IN MY HEAD. IT'S GONNA BE HARD TO GET OVER IT. YEA, IT'S NOT LIKE YOU CHEATED OR SOMETHING BUT I'M SORRY COS I JUST CAN'T ACCEPT NA GINAWA MO 'YUN KNOWING THAT IT WOULD HURT ME A LOT AND THAT IT WAS SOOOOO WRONG. PFFFT.

Bliss.

Grabe, everything's turning out great. I am happy. I am inlove. So inlove with you, babe. You're indescribably amazing. Wonderful in every single way. I won't fucking trade you for anything in the world. Having you is just enough. In fact, even MORE than enough. Loving you is all I wanna do for a lifetime. Hay, I don't know what else to say just so the whole world will know how much I love you. Basta, yun na yun. Alam mo na 'yun. At ikaaaw, ikaaaaw, ikaaaaw na :)

At grabe ah, nakakatunaw 'yung mga sinabi mo kanina. Sobra :D Hehe!

Nyay.

You made me laughed so hard today. I've never laughed like that since like forever? Haha. We talked and fooled around. That just felt so great. Oh, I'm loving you even more. I can't wait to be with you. I can't wait to start buying pasalubongs for you. Well, ini-isa isa ko na. Hahahahaha. :D You're just amazing really. Really really amazing.. AND HOT! :D Hehe.

i just KNOW.

We're both aligned in framed of mind but circumstance has got us good
And now you're seeing a side of me I wished no one ever would
Yeah, if it's right to pick a fight, we're fingers in a sugar bowl
Love isn't perfect, even diamonds start out as coal

C'mon, in spite of this we're doing just fine
Even diamonds start as coal
Give us time to shine
Even diamonds start as coal

Give it time girl, the fire feels divine
The sweetest things they burn before they shine
We think way too much
Look at us losing touch
A promise is a promise until...
-Diamonds and Coal, Incubus

We're gonna do fine. I know. I JUST know. Kahit sobrang nag-aaway tayo, which is mostly my fault, everything will still turn out okay. I super believe in us, you know? I love you babe.

Eleven Minutes

Profound desire, true desire is the desire to be close to someone. From that point onwards, things change, the man and the woman come into play, but what happens before - the attraction that brought them together - is impossible to explain. It is untouched desire in its purest state.

When desire is still in the pure state, the man and the woman fall in love with life, they live each moment reverently, consciously, always ready to celebrate the next blessing.

When people feel like this, they are not in a hurry, they do not precipitate events with unthinking actions. They know that the inevitable will happen, that what is real always finds a way of revealing itself. When the moment comes, they do not hesitate, they do not miss an opportunity, they do not let slip a single magic moment, because they respect the importance of each second.

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Freedom only exists when love is present. The person who gives hom or herself wholly, the person who feels freest, is the person who loves wholeheartedly.

And the person who loves wholeheartedly feels free.

In love no one can harm anyone else; we are each of us responsible for our own feelings and cannot blame someone else for what we feel.

No one loses anyone because no one owns anyone.

That is the true experience of freedom: having the most important thing in the world without owning it.

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A writer once said that it is not time that changes a man, nor knowledge; the only thing that can change someone's mind is love. What nonsense! The person who wrote that clearly knew only one side of the coin.

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Love was undoubtedly one of the things capable of changing a person's whole life, from one moment to the next.

But there was the other side of the coin, the second thing that could make a human being take a totally different course from the one he or she had planned; and that was called despair.

Yes, perhaps love really could transform someone, but despair did the job more quickly.

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When we meet someone and fall in love, we have a sense that the whole universe is on our side. And yet if something goes wrong, there is nothing left! How is it possible for the beauty that was there only minutes before to vanish so quickly? Life moves very fast. It rushes from heaven to hell in a matter of seconds.

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Everyone knows how to love, because we are all born with that gift. Some people have a natural talent for it, but the majority of us have to re-learn, to remember how to love, and everyone, without exception, needs to burn on the bonfire of past emotions, to relive certain joys and griefs, certain ups and downs until they can see the connecting thread that exists behind each new encounter; because there is a connecting thread.

Jason Mraz

OH, I'm inlove with him. Like really really inlove. Hahaha. :D

And it takes no time to fall in love
but it takes you years to know what love is
and it takes some fears to make you trust
it takes those tears to make it rust
it takes the dust to have it polished
- Life is Wonderful

Whatever.

No, I didn't lose my links. They're still here with me and I'll try to visit them one by one next time.

Dutzy just wants a very very simple layout.. Hehe.

Coke Addict.

I wasn't able to sleep last night because of too much coke. Good thing that I don't have class today kasi sick daw si Bernard. Nyuurf. Pero I'm in skuul though cos I need to do my courework kasi broken parin si PC. Tsk. I think that they might need to buy us a new one na cos there is no way na maayos pa 'yun. Yay.

Currently reading Anansi Boys.. And so far, sooo good. Impeccably amazing. Hmm, maybe that kept me awake last night. I just couldn't stop reading kasi eh. Hehe.

I have a super classmate named Maaza and she super looks like Halle Berry. I love her super shot hair a lot. It fitted her. Really nice. Anyway, she is a great person naman pero there's something annoying with her personality and this is the way she bugs me whenever we're in class, whenever I'm not in the mood and whenever she just wants to. Bitch. She can also be really bossy at times but I love love her though. Oh yeah, and I treat her just the same pala. Hahahahaha. :D It is great talking to her about stuff especially last Wednesday when we talked about religion stuff and even if she's not sure if she's even a Catholic, she still got to advise me and it did made me think. It's like she made some things clear for me. Basta, she's great. All of them are..

I have my Hottie #1 and Hottie #2. Hmm, I'll show you the pic of Mr. Hottie #2 kapag na-upload ko na. Kaso side view lang eh, sayang. He's chinito by the way. Basta, handsome. Hahaha. And si Mr. Hottie #1, crush ko talaga 'yun supeer kaya I'm really really shy whenever he's around. Hahahahaha. Syempre, kaya whenver I have time I always go sa library para makita ko siya. Hahahaha. Joke lang:P Katawa naman 'yun sooobra. Ayy, yeah one time grabe talaga cos I borrowed this book tapos siya sa checkout counter.. hello naman, nahiya talaga ako ehh. Feeling ko magffaint na ako. Hahahaha. Naku, when I get the chance to take a picture of him na kahit na I know na medyo it would take a long time pa cos it would be really really obvious, I'll show you guys talaga. Pero wala, may MUCH MUCH HOTTER sa kanilang dalawa. Wala talagang tatalo dun. Oooppps, sino kaya 'yun? Eh 'yun talaga proven na hott. Hahahahaha. Oh, eh bakit abot tenga na ngiti mo dyan? :P

Ewan ko baaa.. Whenever I'm around my crushes talaga, I just want to like hide and everything. Hahahaha. Masyadong kinikilig. Tssk, like nung dati. Basta, 'yung dati. Basta. Yun na un. Kakahiya soooobra. Hahahahahaha. :D

Oh siya, that's all. I'm gon go home now and watch Friends :))

P.S. You are the love of my life. :)

ZARA is haunting me.

Nuthin' much. Just a little update kasi feeling ko lang medyo I'm abandoning na my blog. So someone suprised me last Tuesday and it made my day so special. Basta, it made me smile talaga. Big time. At I can't get over it. Oo, until now. Sorry naman someone's luukin' real hott talaga eh. Hahaha. :)

Ayun. 'Yun lang naman. Saw some kyuut shirts for you. Bibilhin ko talaga 'yun. Ang gaganda eh. Basta. Basta talaga. Hehe. Hope you'd like them, though. Di ko pa nga nabibili eh no? Hahaha. Wait ka lang :D

Wow, can't believe I ENJOY going to skuul na. As in ENJOY talaga kahit na medyo boring 'yung lesson at times. Pwede na nga akong model student eh. Hahaha! :P

Un. Un lang naman ulit..