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Someday.

I'm trying to get hold of myself at the moment. Release any negative and depressing thoughts in my mind and hmm, trying to be positive about everything. I've realized that I should love myself first, I should learn to let go of the past, and that everything has its own reasons.

PATIENCE shall be my virtue from now on.

Everything is just so vague. The pain does not go away. And if I don't do these things I just might be stupid enough to do such thing.

This wouldn't end here. I know.

I would never ever get tired of WAITING cos maybe, just maybe, someday everything will fall into its right place.

So I pray and pray and pray..

Naka-drugs eh noh.

Pucha, someone like talked to me after I got off the bus. And like asked me this inappropriate question. As in I answered with a big NO noh. Hahaha. Puch, badtrip 'yun ah. BUT well, it was kind of okay talking to her naman. Kasooo scary at the same time cos she looked like baliw noh. Eh kasii naman high ata sa drugs eh, drunk din. Jusko. Haha. Obvious daw na anoooo ehhhhh. Pero ewaan ko sakanya. Hahahaha. Mukha daw din akong lasing. Eh ano pa siya? Hahahahaha! And shiiit, she lives near our place lang so like mamaya makita ko siya and she knows where I live din so like mamaya pumunta na lang 'yun dito bigla. Hahahahaha. Shiit. Baliw 'yun eh. Hahahahaha, puch!

Hassle.

I left home the usual time. I took the 345 bus as always then got off at South Kensington Station. Then, a bus arrived na which I know is 414 naman. As in I looked at the label(?) talaga and it said 414, Maida Hill. So yeah, right on time lang papuntang school. But then I noticed that the bus was going sa wrong way na and so I thought na maybe may diversion or something, that maybe some roadwork is taking place near sa Knightsbridge. Pero after asking the person near me, I realized that I took the wrong bus pala. Eh 49 'yun so like it's papunta sa Kensington High Street pa. Hassle talaga. Good thing that there's a #10 bus going to Hyde Park Corner and from there I took the 414 bus. So yeah, got like 10 minutes before 9 I was in Edgware Road na & by 5-minute walk I'll arrive na sa skuul. Right on time lang. PERO eto EH (haha) my slippers got broken. As in after I got off sa bus as in nasira talaga. Puch, hassle talaga. & it was totally embarassing! Syeeeetttt! Hahahaha. And my ex-crush saw me pa. I was looked like super crippled and all. Jeez man, ang hirap noh. Hahahahaha. I was like planning to go home na nga eh cos wala akong makitang shop na malapit eh sa Oxford Street naman the shops are still closed and it's like super layo pa from there. Hello naman. Hahahaha. But good thing I have my stapler. Hahaha, syempre I stapled it na lang cos I don't want to skip skuul noh:P Haha, ewan. Nahiya talaga ako.. Tska I was worried pa and stuff kasii late na nga akoo.

But hmmmm made it all better.:) Hehe:P

Pero syeet ahh, I KNOOOOW talaga that it was 414. AS IN 414 talaga I just couldn't understand why biglang naging 49. I mean, 414 talaga eh. I made titig pa talaga sa bus number ehh. Hmm, that was freaky. Or maybe I hallucinated a bit or something. Pero.. that was the bus lang naman that arrived that time. Wala namang iba, ata(?). See, I really couldn't remember. That was all I could think of lang talaga sa bus. Hahahaha, labooo. Ewan. 414 'yun ehh. Hahahahahaha.

..it's gonna be okay

I tell that myself a million times these past few days cos if I don't I'm gonna be totally MORE than broken right now. As in. AS IN. I haven't cried since. Hmmm. Yeah.

Anyway, these past few days have been fun as well naman. They kind took my mind off things:)

Friday. Kim slept over here. Hahaha. As if it was the first time. He ALWAYS sleep here as in like every week ata and he always is the last one who falls asleep but this time syeeet 12 pa lang and he was snoring big time na. Syempre when we told him about it the next morning sobrang in denial talaga.. Eh kasi naman ako lagi pinupuna niya eh. I snore daaw palibhasa I sleep una most of the time. Hehe.

Saturday. Yeheeey. Happy 4th Birthday to our beautiful Kirsten!:) We decorated the hall in Fulham. Puro balloons and stuff. Nice! Syempre we were the ones who decorated it eh.. Hahahaha! Shiit, bigtime madness din and trippings. Laughed real hard cos we were playing with the balloons. Eh diba when you like inhaled the helium soobrang your voice is gonna be small, ehhh si Terence parang tanga. Hahahaha! Ayaaaaw pa nga namin umuwi ehh and we thought that we were gonna sleepover there. Hmmmf. Hehe. Tintin liked all of her gifts except the clothes! Mighad that little girl talagaaa... Hahahaha.

Sunday. We watched erhmm, Spiderman 3.Hmm, I didn't like it that much. Too much drama eh. What's up with EMO SPIDEY? Hehehe. He looked like Pete Wentz from Fall Out Boy:P Kuya Chris(?), 'yung Kinley and 'yung Ronaldo were with us. Hahahaha. It was my first time to hang out with them kasii eh. And Kuya Chris was totally naiilang pa talaga with us but hopefully masanay na siya soon cos he's gonna be seeing us ng matagal tagal pa. Hahahaha. I know though that he's kuul. Obvious naman ehh:P Oh yeah, we plan to go sa Thorpe park this half term! :) Yeeeeeey!

Today. They went here na naman. Sina Terence and Kim. Hmm. Kwento lang and stuff:)

Masaya. Oo, masaya. Kahit with in those very moments lang. At least, diba?:) Big help talaga. *sigh*

I hope this someone would call me na. Kailangan ko ng kausaaap! Please.

I believe.

No matter how screwed we are right now, I still am in love with you. I mean, that never changed and it won't ever will. I love you. I do. Hope you know that. We can get pass this. WE WILL GET PASS THIS.

Coffee Addiction.

I've had too much coffee already to think that it's just past 11. Hindi rin ako nag-breakfast kaya ayan tuloy sooobrang my head aches talaga. And jeeez, 'yung bladder ko. Hahahahaha. Shiiiz, dapat din nga di ako papasok ehhhhh.

Share lang.

& as you all can see, I changed my layout again. And I shall stick with this for a very loooong time, hehe. :) Wala lang.

Gago ka, Sabrina

Hahaha. Badtrip, naputol! Namiss ko agad kagaguhan mo. Wahahaha.

Tinatamad pa ako mag-ayos ng blog. Eto lang ang nahanap kong maayos na template. Nabubulok na ehhhhh.

No worries

Finally, they bought us a new CPU and FINALLY, fixed na 'yung internet. Hooooo. It fucks up lang most of the time. Fuck Homechoice. Can't install Chikka din, badtrip. Hahaha. Ewan. Rumandom talaga.

Shiiiiit, talked to my Baby a.k.a Ivz and Bestfriend last Friday. Hahahaha. Astiiig. I wasn't actually planning on calling them pero wala eh, namimiss ko na ng sooobra. Awww, Ivz would be migrating na sa Canada and they'll be leaving sa May:( Saad, sooobra cos I won't be able to see her foooor a looong looong time na naman. As in, hindi ko man lang maaabutan. Hmmmff. Oh well, told her that I'll be visiting her there sooon. Hahaha. And yeah, call her since it's much cheaper. And bestfriend naman is planning to study Medicine here. I hope her Auntie finds a job na para at least okay na. Fingers crossed lang.

Shiiit (again), sabi ko na nga ba there's definitely still hope. Okay, I don't wantna jinx it so I won't tell anyone yet. Basta. I don't wanna get tooooo excited about it as well cos I might just get too disappointed again! Basta, steady lang talaga. Kaya bestfriend, hindi ko na pala sasabihin sa'yo. Hahahaha. It made me real smile yesterday talaga. Steeeaaady lang, dear..

I'll get back to work na. Still need to finish my coursework. Darn.

Teeheeee

A rockstar invited me in Myspace. Hahahahahaha! Whatever. ;) Mind you people, he's hooot. Hahahahaha!

X/S.
He's the vocalist and lead guitarist pala and his name is JEREMIE BENJAMIN. THE PEAKS is the name of the band and they have a tour here in London in 4 months time. Well, I'm listening to some of their songs right now and I'm lovin' it:) Hehe. So guys better checkout their Myspace account and their site.

Oh yeah, a video din which I got from YouTube :)

Oo na, crush ko na siya. Hahaha. Duh, kilig nung minessage ako noh. Hahahaha.

Crap.

Fuck, I hate it. SO much.

my hottie librarian, you look so well, hot with your eyeglasses on :) hihi.

Mushy.ness

All my life, all I have ever wanted was someone who would love me for who I am, someone who would just stick around, and someone who I'd love more than I love myself..

Then you came along, and I never wanted for more.

Run with me through rows of speeding cars

* Talked to Him. And it felt great. Haven't done that in ages. I've been putting Him off for the past months. Actually, for the past 2 years. I don't know why, I just kept on ignoring Him and took Him for granted. But I know that we're okay now. I explained, said sorry, told Him stories and shared a lot of stuff about what's going on in my life. That no matter how crappy and depressing everything is I know that He would be just be with me. He just listened to every word that I was saying and I felt at ease whilst talking to Him. It was amazing. Really really amazing. Can't wait for our next session! :)

* I used to care for you. I used to be happy and relieved that you're just there. And I used to love you. But now everything has just changed. I don't know why exactly. It's like you're a different person now. It's like I got really disappointed when I got to know the real you. And I just learned how to hate you. That the more I get to be with you, the more I can't stand you. Hay, it hurts not to love you anymore. I dunno.

* I hope you two could still work it out. I really really hope so. :(

* A lot of people told me na "hanga" daw sila with our relationship. That despite the distance we still manage to work it out. It's, I think, because we believe, we never stop hoping and loving. That no matter how much we fight and all, we just know that this won't ever end anymore. Cos we believe in US. I know that you know that we really are different. As in, magkaiba talaga. But we get to love each other more despite our differences. I don't know really if everything's okay with us right now. Basta, I'm gonna talk to you na talaga.

* It sucks cos I haven't watched MSKM for two months now. Arrrgh. And American Idol pisses me off na, why is it that those great singers are the ones sent home? :(

* GUSTO KO NG UMUWI! Rawr. Hahahaha :D

EWAN.

Hahahaha. EWAN KO NA TALAGA. Anyway, yesterday was real crappy. Basta, YUN NA YUN. I don't want to go further into details. Let's just say na I STILL CAN'T LET IT GO. Hahahaha. EWAN. But dinner was fuuuuun! As in tawa to the max talaga. Tito Noe kasi was real funny. Basta. Comedy eh. Sobra.

I'm currently taking an online practice test for Bristish Citizenship. Yea, that's right in few hours time if I am able to pass the exam eh di Citizen na ako dito. Haha. EWAN. I don't even care if I'd pass the test or not. Basta, it doesn't matter to me lang. Pero yeah, it has some advantages din pero EWAN padin. Hahahaha. Sorry, laboooo. I'm so pressured na with skuul. I haven't edited the paper pa for 23 and started the paper for 22 naman. Arrrgh. Hahaha. Oh well.

My layout's image is from Devianart pala and it features Death from Sandman series by Neil Gaiman. :) Ciao!

P.S. The hottie librarian made my day! ;)

WASTED.

hahahahahahaha :D

...

Still can't get over "it".

It's eating my heart and brains out.. :(

!@!*!

GALIT AKO. GALIT NA GALIT AKO SA GINAWA MO. CAN'T BELIEVE YOU! HINDI MO MAN LANG INISIP KUNG ANONG MAFFEEL KO. EWAN KO. BAHALA KA. IT HURTS. YOU JUST DON'T KNOW HOW MUCH. I KEEP ON PICTURING THE "THING" IN MY HEAD. IT'S GONNA BE HARD TO GET OVER IT. YEA, IT'S NOT LIKE YOU CHEATED OR SOMETHING BUT I'M SORRY COS I JUST CAN'T ACCEPT NA GINAWA MO 'YUN KNOWING THAT IT WOULD HURT ME A LOT AND THAT IT WAS SOOOOO WRONG. PFFFT.

Bliss.

Grabe, everything's turning out great. I am happy. I am inlove. So inlove with you, babe. You're indescribably amazing. Wonderful in every single way. I won't fucking trade you for anything in the world. Having you is just enough. In fact, even MORE than enough. Loving you is all I wanna do for a lifetime. Hay, I don't know what else to say just so the whole world will know how much I love you. Basta, yun na yun. Alam mo na 'yun. At ikaaaw, ikaaaaw, ikaaaaw na :)

At grabe ah, nakakatunaw 'yung mga sinabi mo kanina. Sobra :D Hehe!

Nyay.

You made me laughed so hard today. I've never laughed like that since like forever? Haha. We talked and fooled around. That just felt so great. Oh, I'm loving you even more. I can't wait to be with you. I can't wait to start buying pasalubongs for you. Well, ini-isa isa ko na. Hahahahaha. :D You're just amazing really. Really really amazing.. AND HOT! :D Hehe.

i just KNOW.

We're both aligned in framed of mind but circumstance has got us good
And now you're seeing a side of me I wished no one ever would
Yeah, if it's right to pick a fight, we're fingers in a sugar bowl
Love isn't perfect, even diamonds start out as coal

C'mon, in spite of this we're doing just fine
Even diamonds start as coal
Give us time to shine
Even diamonds start as coal

Give it time girl, the fire feels divine
The sweetest things they burn before they shine
We think way too much
Look at us losing touch
A promise is a promise until...
-Diamonds and Coal, Incubus

We're gonna do fine. I know. I JUST know. Kahit sobrang nag-aaway tayo, which is mostly my fault, everything will still turn out okay. I super believe in us, you know? I love you babe.